Coma Commander

Too many Corn Pops, and not enough milk. Thats what my doctor says caused me to black out and go into a coma. I'm not a scientist, so I couldn't even begin to understand how it was possible. Regardless, I'll never make that mistake again.

I don't know what its like for the rest of you when you're coma-ing it up, but for me, I found myself in a dream-like realm where everything looked like an untalented art-school student's rendition of a cubist painting. Also, I discovered that the Comadreamland version of me was very proficient at using throwing axes, something that I was not very good at in my conscious reality.

I grew bored of this new world very quickly. I missed my everyday life. The walks to the abandoned shoe factory. My daily cup of red milk. Catching up on episodes of "Everyone Loves Love." This place was a drag.

Finally, my moment of reckoning came. The giant crayon-drawn bird, Crayoloc, came down from the poorly rendered sky and offered me my freedom. I gladly accepted. There was one condition.

I had to blog. Forever.