Level 5: Spleen

I guess the most embarassing moment of my life, thus far, was when I accidently knocked over an urn sitting on my grandmother's mantle. I had assumed for so long that it contained the ashes of some relative of mine, but upon the urn breaking open I discovered that it actually contained the ashes of a long dead wizard. Obviously, if you know anything about death, this means that the ashes were enchanted and that by coming in contact with my skin I would be affected by the enchantment. Don't ask me what the enchantment entailed, but all I know is that I turned into a Nintendo game cartridge. I'm talking 8-bit NES, here, you know?

Well, my grandmother walks by and she sees that the urn was knocked over. She then sees me, in Nintendo game form. She calls out into the house, "Hey! You left your Nintendo tape in this pile of ash!" I don't respond (because I'm said tape, remember), and she assumes I'm outside playing in the trees or something. So she takes the cartridge and goes over to the TV where she decides (with crazy old-grandma logic, no doubt) that she'll actually try playing the Nintendo.

Lo and behold, she starts playing the game...which is also my body! So basically, she has to win the game by making it through all of my very pixelated bodily organs without losing all her lives. Man, you don't know embarassment until your grandmother has to play through your heart with only one life left because she was repeatedly getting hit by stray arteries.

Anyways, she won the game, I became a real boy again, and we never ever talked about it again.